Expo and Knives

That's an odd title. I'll explain it later.

The primary purpose of our trip to Shanghai, China, was as always, to visit family, friends and just enjoy the city. But this time we were also eager to see the Shanghai World Expo!

The Expo Mascot - I called him 'Gumby Dammit' (SNL reference)

World Expo is the new version of 'World's Fair'. This year's theme was "Better City, Better Life". Each participating nation was to showcase their cities, life and their future.

There were over 250 countries represented. After just two days, we had only visited 10 pavilions. And, unfortunately, we'd had enough.

Ren Shan, Ren Hai

It was not so much the 300,000 to 400,000 visitors per day, the place was large enough to handle that volume. It was the long lines at just about every pavilion. Most all of them were not designed to handle that many people per day.

Some of the more popular pavilions, like the USA, Japan, South Korea, had waiting lines as long as 2-3 hours, just to get in for a 15-30 minute experience. We never made it to those.

Here are some pictures of those we did make it into.

 Inside the Sri Lanka Pavilion

 Finland Entrance

 Inside Finland you could get your picture floated up on the wall

A New Zealand Tiki ??

And some photos outside around the expo grounds.

The park lit up at night was quite pretty

 During the day it was and endless expanse of concrete

One thing that disappointed me most about the expo grounds was the lack of green spaces. It was mostly concrete, with little shade, and very little natural shade, which made the whole place less inviting - and a lot hotter than it should have been.

Perspective Distortion is an Ugly Mistress

Of course, we had to go to the China pavilion, it was one of the largest and most iconic. Inside there were 55 sub-pavilions, each representing the 55 ethnic minorities of China.

The costumes worn by their hostesses were very beautiful as well, so I had to get some shots of them.

I'm married, not dead.

Each day of the expo would be 'National Day' for one of the represented countries. Typically, the country would put on a show or dance at one of the many outdoor stages. Here is the Republic of Korea:



And lastly, knives:

Guns are forbidden in China. You never hear of a shooting there. Stabbings, yes - unfortunately. There were a rash of stabbing, especially of school children, in China this year. So it appears that removing guns does not necessarily remove crime - violent crime. As with the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, the 2010 Expo in Shanghai enacted a ban on the sale of all but the smallest of knives.

You could not buy a knife of any kind, including kitchen knives, in any of the regular stores. Department stores, mom & pop stores, convenience stores, no-where. Only specific government run knife shops could sell knives during Expo. We wanted to buy a knife so we could do some cooking in our kitchen, but ended up borrowing one from my father-in-law until we found a shop that could sell them.

Then, in order to buy the knife, you had to register it: provide your phone number and national ID card and number. It was just like buying a hand-gun in the States, without the 7 day waiting period. It seemed extreme, but appears to work. Then again, what's to keep someone from picking up a rock...

Fast Food Wars

Contrary to the movie Demolition Man where it's stated that the Fast Food Wars of the early 21st century left only Taco Bell standing, at least in Shanghai, KFC reigns supreme.

Its not that Taco Bell didn't try. They did. And they must have watched Demolition Man because their restaurant was right out of the movie: High class with waiters, maitre d's, a pianist, the works. Everything you'd expect from a 5 star upper class establishment.

The Taco Bell Grande' from 2006

But alas, that place is gone. KFC is everywhere.

The standing myth is that Kentucky Fried Chicken changed its name to KFC because they weren't using real chicken anymore but instead some gene altered hybrid with 6 legs and 8 wings. But the real reason is that, especially in Shanghai, its not just Fried Chicken anymore. And that, my friends, is why they have won the Fast Food Wars.

They offer breakfasts, lunches and dinners of traditional chinese food like soups, rice and Dim-Sum like snacks. They offer more than just chicken fried: baked, steamed, broiled. They offer traditional drinks like Soy Milk and Green Tea.

Whereas McDonalds is still stuck on Burgers. Traditionally, the Chinese don't eat a lot of beef, and my wife does not like beef at all. So McDonalds does offer shrimp, fish and chicken, but its still burgers. And that is why I think they lost. That's not to say that McDonalds is not all over as well, but KFC is just about everywhere.

And Taco Bell? Well, tacos just didn't catch on. I could not find a single one this trip.

KFC in the Park!

I've seen KFC stands in Parks and at the Expo. In the trendier shopping areas you can turn around 360 degrees and count 4 or more within a one block area. They are in the subways, shopping malls, in tents at events, at the stadium, and on bicycle and mopeds doing deliveries.

Not just McDonalds, everyone delivers on bicycles in Shanghai.

I really got to tip my hat to them for a very successful launch in Shanghai.

Of course I'm also seeing more overweight people there as well as ads for weight loss diets and drinks, gyms, corsets and plastic surgery.

A Day in the Life - In Shanghai

PuDong at the HuangPu River at Night

People often ask me what life is like in China. On a national scale, I can't answer this and it would be too generically stereotypical to be fair or accurate. But what I can do is describe our typical day in Shanghai when we go to visit - which we just returned from one.

The Kitchen with the Instant Water Heater

Where we stay has an instant water heater (no tank), the kind you see more of now in the US. These are quite common in Shanghai where space is a premium, and it mounts on the wall. Ours is in the kitchen. Before, it used LP Gas and was quite finicky: it would overheat easily and shut down, sending you from scalding hot to icy cold showers regularly. Now it has been switched to Natural Gas and its very reliable. The only thing stopping me now from getting one here is the price - they're just too expensive here in the US compared to traditional tank water heaters (I think).

Electricity and water is at a premium in Shanghai, so conservation is key. I could not find a single regular incandescent bulb at the local stores anywhere - they were all Compact Florescence. And washing machines are much smaller with most being front loaders for further water conservation. No electric or gas dryers that I could find - you hang your cloths out to dry instead.

Our View in the Morning (but not early enough for Tai Chi)

Early in the morning, you could see people practicing Tai-Chi in the Shanghai Outdoor Stadium parking lot or in the parks. I never did get up early enough to join them - maybe next trip.

Noodle Soup, Steamed Bread, Fried Noodles and Won-ton Soup

When it comes to breakfast, traditionally this is a noodle or won-ton soup and perhaps a bowl of hot soy milk. Boy, I miss those soups, and I have really grown to like soy milk. There are a couple of little restaurants nearby that served the best noodle soup and sweet hot soy milk. Yum...you just can't find that here.

One family owned place we would frequent for breakfast and lunch

There are 7 ways to get around in Shanghai. They all have their pluses and minuses:

1. Walking
   Cheapest and easiest. Most everything is within walking distance and if its too big to carry (toaster oven or larger) delivery is almost always free.
2. Bicycle
   Cheap and fast. People ride these everywhere: streets, sidewalks. Stop lights, stop signs, walkways do not apply - just ring your little bell and keep going. And there are actually parking spaces for bicycles and mopeds.
3. Mopeds/Scooters
   Still pretty cheap (I'll blog about this latter), and just like bicycles, people ride them in the streets, sidewalks, everywhere. Traffic laws don't seem to apply - honk your horn and go on. I did see one girl ride over a guy's foot. They spent a long time arguing over who was at fault. [actually, the guy was staring at me (being a blond headed foreigner with a lovely local wife) and the girl was looking at something else - so neither one was paying much attention]
4. Buses
   One fare fits all. One block or a complete ride around Shanghai is just ¥2 (about $0.35). If you are retired, its free during off-peak times. If your not in a hurry and its too far to walk, this is your best bet. You don't have to worry about the traffic - let the driver do that. And you can people-watch all you want.
5. Subway
   These are just wonderful in Shanghai. Fast, quiet, cheap, clean, cool, and fun. You are charged buy the length of the trip (about ¥2 to ¥5). But I guess you could just get on, ride around a while, return to your starting point and only get charged the minimum fee. Anywhere you want to go in Shanghai is within just a few blocks of a subway station. And if its cold, hot or rainy outside, just head down into a station and do your shopping there. Some stations exits are even inside shopping malls and grocery stores. So, conceivably, you could do all your shopping without have to step back outside.
6. Taxi
   If you need to get from point A to point B and don't have time to wait for a buss or run to a subway station, this is the right choice for you. Its more expensive with the minimum fare being ¥12 ($2). But it still a far cry better than owning a car.
7. Car
   Are you insane? Are you just filthy rich (sales tax on cars is high and licenses are almost as much as the car itself) or a Corporate/Government VIP? Do you like driving in bumper to bumper traffic everywhere inches from certain death (at a mind numbing 20kph) only to find that there is absolutely no where to park once you get there? These are driven and parked just about everywhere as well: streets, sidewalks, alleys, etc. Walk, its better for your physical and mental health...really.

Shanghai's 431kph (256mph) MagLev Train [who's that lovely woman?]

I'll talk about Trains in another post...its time to go shopping now.

Aside from cars and property (land, apartments, houses, etc), there is no sales tax in China and no yearly reoccurring personal property taxes like here. The price on the item is the price you pay. If its a large store, or government owned, there is little, if any, wiggle room on the price. But if its a small family owned store, bargaining becomes an art form. If you are a foreigner, you will almost always pay too much. The thought there is that if you make more, you should pay more. So I usually let my wife go in and bargain while I go elsewhere out of sight.

Century Mart...hmmmm....sounds like another company I know...
Century Mart is located at the base of Shanghai Outdoor Stadium just around back and just the other side of the street where we stay. They have everything! Mopeds/Motor-scooters (electric), computers, cell phones, clothing, housewares, food, liquor - everything. It's our favorite store. There are checkout lanes just like a Wal-Mart/Target, but some things, like DVDs, that you need to pay for in that department. I found this out the hard way when I bought the Chinese version of "Avatar" by myself. I was chased down by one poor lady trying to get my attention as I was walking away with the DVD (my Chinese needs more work). You can also get some traditional Chinese medicinal cures like deer antlers and penises (not sure what that's for and not sure I want to know), and caterpillar fungus - which is very expensive. I found the really big difference in Shanghai department stores and here is that there are lost of employees in every department all wanting to help you find what you are looking for - almost to the point of it being a competition between people trying to sell you one version of an item over another (and they don't work on commission).

If you live in an older section of town, the food often comes to you. Food Peddlers (literally) on bicycles ride through the streets and alleys selling their produce.

Shopping in Shanghai ranges from the ridiculously expensive to the ridiculously cheap. There very well know street, named Hau Hai Lu, that has all your most 'elite' European stores: Louis Vuitton, Rolex, Porch, Ferrari, etc.

One of the thousands of little clothing stores at Cheap-A-Lu

And there is the street called 'Cheap-A-Lu' (its not spelled that way, but it might as well be). Imagine a four story building the size of a city block, each floor crammed with dozens of 10x10 ft shops each, in turn, crammed with clothing. Now multiply that times four! You have thousands of shops, most all of which are personally owned. It is a mind numbing, overwhelming experience. This is where your bargaining skills are put to the test. Take the price they offer and cut it by a fifth or even a tenth and work up very slowly from there. If your a foreigner, you'll still pay too much, but if you are a native, you have a chance of getting a great price. Your best tactic is to fain disinterest and walk away. If you not asking too little, they will call you back, or even follow you...continuing to bargain. If they don't, find another shop that will and try again. It can be quite fun, but it will also wear you out fast.

Old Town at Night [Expo Advertising was Everywhere!]

This was the first trip where I saw street cleaning machines, just like we have here. Usually (and still done), there are individuals in blue overalls, caps and masks constantly patrolling the streets with wheelbarrows and makeshift brooms, sweeping up the trash and cleaning out the bins. As a result, there streets are always very clean. With the Shanghai Expo this year (another post), it was even cleaner.

Clean, Bright and Beautiful!

The air was much cleaner this time as well, an improvement that I hope continues. This was due in part to the Shanghai Expo, but also due to a change in moped policy. Only electric mope-heads are sold now. Gasoline and LP Gas have been outlawed. So as old ones wear out, they are being replaced with these cleaner electric ones. As the gas and LP were most often two-stroke engines, they were quite dirty. I estimate that around 1 in 10 are now electric, up from 0 just a few years ago. And as mopeds outnumber cars, this was causing a lot of pollution. And they are so much quieter. This really helps out with the noise levels.

The Web of Construction!

Construction techniques are different as well. Building are often encased in a bamboo or steel frames covered in a green mesh material that is reminiscent of a cocoon. This travels up and down with the construction and allows the workers to walk around the outside without the risk of falling to dropping tools onto the street below.

Tap water is generally considered non-potable (not drinkable), but I have seen a number of workers drink directly from garden hoses (they must have strong stomachs). As a result, most houses have water coolers like you see on TV office dramas. When you run out of water, just call the distributor and within minutes, at all times of day or night, someone on a bicycle will arrive with a new 5 gallon drum. This was the only thing I have seen in China that still uses the Imperial system. Everything else is Metric.

Typical Hospital in Shanghai

Heath Care is different as well. Its pretty much universal in China, although I believe there are still rural areas yet untouched. As for Shanghai, with the exception of specialty practices like acupuncture/acupressure, massage, etc., there are no Doctors Offices. If you are sick, or need a check up, you go to the hospital. There are specialty hospitals as they have here: Cancer, Maternity, Children's, etc., but the routine goes something like this:
Go to the main check-in desk at the hospital and explain what you are there for. Receive a ticket and directions as to which floor and section to go to. When you get there you check in at their desk and take a seat in the lobby (much like a Boarding Terminal at an Airport). They call your name and number and flash it on a large display. You have 30 seconds to respond or you lose your turn. The nurse takes you to a room where a doctor examines you. When done, you are given a bill and possibly a prescription. You take the bill to the payment window along with your insurance and pay a very small fraction of the total. If there is a prescription, you take that to another window and pick up and pay for it - again at a very small fraction of the total.

I don't know the routines for Emergencies or General Surgeries, but that's pretty much what its like for general problems. There's no making appointments with your Dr weeks in advance or running to the Emergency Room with a Cold or the Flu. But there is also no personal physician either. I figure it this way: I only see my personal physician once a year and they only remember me by the notes in their folder, so it just about like meeting them for the first time each time anyway. As a whole, it seems to to work, and with 20million people in Shanghai alone, I don't see it working better any other way.

Old-Town shopping district during the Lantern Festival

Holidays are also treated differently in China. Chinese New Year is a 15 day long celebration ending in the Lantern Festival. Major businesses close and many retail shops shut down. Independence Day and Moon Holiday are 7 day long events as well. And because many of the smaller retain shops are run by people from outside the city, there is a mass exodus by train as people return to their towns and homes for the holidays. Parts of the city then resemble ghost towns.

At the end of the day, there is sleep. But the beds are hard. I think this is the norm. I also think this is where Star Trek got its inspiration for Klingon beds. Its supposed to be better for your back and circulation. I'm not sure. but after a full day, it really doesn't matter. I'm out like a light and 'Sleep like a Pig' (Chinese saying) anyway.

Our View at Night

So, "Good Night and Good Luck".

DVDs: The Real Cost

<rant>

What's wrong with this picture?

Avatar and Sherlock Holmes @ ¥25 each

These are legit DVDs bought at department store and a government owned local bookstore in Shanghai.

Give up? It's not Mr. Mouse. He loves watching movies.

The Price! ¥25 = $3.67

Hey, those same movies are $20-$30 in the US - what's up with that?

All major motion picture DVDs are already manufactured in China and then shipped over here. So the difference isn't the production cost. It must be the shipping, handling, stocking and store overhead. But wait! It's gotta cost something in China for that same process, right? So how much money is the movie industry making, per DVD, in China?

I'd guess about $1.

I cannot imagine they are only making $1 here in the US on the same movie priced at $30.

But what if they were?

What if they could produce, distribute and sell movies in the US with the same overhead as in China and still make $1 per copy?

They can. It's called 'The Internet'

I truly believe that if the Motion Picture Industry of America invested their money in online, downloadable movie sales, like Apple does with iTunes, and Amazon does with MP3 music, they could sell many many more movies, make a killing in profits, and virtually eliminate the black market. After all, if you could buy a legitimate copy of a movie for $4, you would, right? I would. And I'd have little reason to rent anymore as well.

(BTW: The Movie Industry hates movie rental shops and recently restricted rentals on major blockbusters to 30 days after they are released for sale). Avatar is a prime example.

And lets face it, all that plastic packaging, glossy covers, disposable RFI tags are hardly 'green'.

Here's another problem online sales would solve: Spoken Language and Subtitles.

How many of you have someone in your household that natively speaks French or Spanish?
Spanish, sure. French? I don't think so. So why are they putting that on US distributed DVDs?

If the all movies were online and you could choose the Language of the Dialog and Subtitles, they'd sell even more - much more.

Chinese, Hindi, Burmese, Arabic, Russian, German are all languages I personal know people who would love to be able to get on American movies in the US, but can't.

I never went to the theater to watch Avatar, Iron Man, Star Wars 1-3, Spiderman, Batman, etc., because my wife could not follow the dialog. It's a waste of money. Instead I rent them from NetFlix and watch them at home by myself. But if I could buy and download those movies here in the US in Chinese and English @ $4 each, I would!

I'd buy them all!! And we could both enjoy them together!

And just how many is that? According to my stats on NetFlix, I've rented, watched and rated over 900 movies and TV shows.

</rant>

YiWu and the Train

First off, I want to apologize for not getting a picture of the train to YiWu (e-woo). I thought it would be the same one on the return trip. It was not.

I love train rides. I don't know what they are like in America. I hope they are just as sweet. I truly prefer train rides to flying. Its so much more relaxing.

Loading platform at the Shanghai West Train Station

The train we took from Shanghai to YiWu was very new. Sleek, clean, bright and very comfortable. Its top speed was 205 kph (~127 mph). So the 285 km trip took about 2 hours, with 3 stops on the way: Haining (Hi-Ning), Hangzho (Hong-Jo) and Zhuji (Ju-Jee).


View Larger Map

This was the fourth (and fifth) times I'd been on a train in China and the first time not in a sleeper car. Though the lady, from France (I believe) seated next to us slept most of the way (departing at HangZho.) Its not hard to do, sleep that is, as the ride was quiet and smooth. But I was having too much fun watching the countryside roll by and the other passengers on the train.

There was a middle-aged couple (Chinese) who did only two things during the entire trip: talked and ate, and slept. If they weren't talking and eating, they were sleeping, and vice-versa.

As we left Shanghai and slowly climbed the mountains to YiWu, the land turned from apartment buildings and offices, to individual homes and farmland. You could see people out in their fields tending there crops in the morning haze. It was a scene right out of National Geographic. YiWu's elevation is about 900 meters (~2900 feet), so its not too high into the mountains, but you could tell it was higher and that you were traveling upward.

As is usual, trains don't turn around (much) and so to go 'back' they just go in 'reverse'. The interesting thing about this particular train, as I saw a maintenance lady inside, was that you could press a pedal on each row of seats and just swing them around to point the other direction! Very cool!

When we arrived at YiWu, we took a taxi to our final destination. The famous YiWu shopping malls! Eagerly, we grabbed a taxi and took off. This was a bit of a mistake as we ended up getting charged ¥40 ($5.8) for a cap ride that should have only been ¥12 ($2).

YiWu is a major manufacturing city for toys, gifts, jewelry, home decorations, housewares, etc. Most of what you find in Shanghai, along those lines, comes from YiWu. So we went there to stock up!

Well, it was a bit of a disappointment. We didn't understand beforehand that these 'malls' were primarily for Dealers and not Retail. So while the prices were great, you had to buy in bulk.

There were 4 primary buildings, 4 stories tall, all tightly packed with 100sqft shops. One floor sold nothing but toys, one floor was nothing but jewelry, another was home decorations and gift, the top floor was specialty shops. In all, I estimated over 10,000 little shops, all representing their companies' products. And while it was fun walking around and looking at all the stuff, we really didn't buy much.

So, after two hours, we found a bus back to the train station and waited there for another two hours for our train to leave.


Still, it was a nice station and fun to people watch. And I did take a photo of the outside.

Typical Waiting Area in a Train Station

While we were waiting, we got a call from the Post Office, our special order of coins had come in and she wanted to know when we would be able to pick them up. Judging from our trip to YiWu, we figured it would take 2 hours to get back and 30 minutes to get to the Post Office. So we told her 7pm at the latest.

Well, dang it.

The train back to Shanghai was not the same as before. It was older (still clean and nice), but much slower. It ran at only 125kph (77mph), or about half the speed as before. So we called the lady at the Post Office and told her we would be much later, about 8:30 if we were really lucky. While she normally finishes work at 6pm, she said she would wait for us. Actually she insisted on waiting for us. She was afraid that if she left the coins overnight, they would get sold to someone else. This was way above and beyond, and we will thank her with a gift from America next time we go.

And lastly, sitting right across the isle from us on the way back was the same Chinese couple from the train to YiWu! And yes, they were doing the same thing as before: eating and talking, or sleeping - all the way back...

I am Now Officially OLD

I want to read the notes on my Google Phone, or the mintage on a coin, even the ingredients on the bottle of juice. But in order to do that, I need to remove my glasses. What a pain. There were times when I was building the deck that I cut and drilled without glasses because it was the only way I could see what I was doing. Danger, Will Robinson, Danger!!

The eye doctor's perfectly typed, high-contrast note cards under optimum lighting conditions are barely readable. And he says I am borderline for needing bifocals, but I know better. There is no escaping it any more. I need bifocals. I am now officially OLD.

[BTW: This was the same guy who, when I showed him my Pinguecula on my iris due to extended contact wearing, his response was to not worry about it because it was not yet affecting my vision. Wait...what?!? Wait until my eyes are screwed before doing something about it?! I threw away my contacts that evening. Thank you very much.]

So after our exams, we trotted down to the eye glass shop, prescriptions and insurance in hand...only to encounter maximum sticker shock. Two years ago, with insurance, we both bought premium anti-scratch , anti-glare glasses (hers were progressive bifocals) for $350 total. This year, just her glasses alone were $400. Well, that sucked. So we packed out bags and when to China (we weren't overreacting, we were going anyway).

My wife's brother-in-law took us to a shop they use all the time with a great reputation. The optometrist looked at our prescriptions and sets them aside. Instead, he sat us in front of a machine that we look into, one eye at a time, at a scene of a house on a hill. Its a lot like the ones used here for talking pictures of your retina. The machine hums and clicks as the picture goes in and our of focus. Then it spits out your prescription. None of this flipping of lenses in front of your face and endless "Which is better, A or B? Now, 1 or 2?". Ugh.

He opens his box of lenses and loads up a test set of glasses with your prescription and lets you test it out - near and far. Wow! I could count the zits on a teenager's face a block away! And the near vision prescription allowed me to see better than without glasses. I was impressed, as was my wife.

We went a bit overboard, but it was worth it. We both got progressive bifocals in ultralight, no-scratch, anti-glare lenses and then we both bought regular far-vision prescription sunglasses. The total price was not as low as I was expecting: ¥3000 (about $440). But still, four for the price of one in the US and without insurance. Hard to complain.

A week later they were done and ready. It took me a couple of days to adjust to bifocals, the ground looked farther away that it actually was, so I was walking drunk for a couple of days. But other than that, it was perfect from day one. My wife had issues, though. Near-vision was fine, as was medium distances. But far-away objects were giving her double vision. We went back a few days later and had him look things over. He retested her and he checked her old glasses. The new prescription was a bit too strong and her eyes were unable to adjust. So he backed down the strength and sent them back to be remade - no extra charge. A few days later, her sunglasses where done and no more double-vision. The bifocals took longer and would not be ready before we left, so our son will bring them back with him when he returns later this month.

Mr. Mouse is standing in for the fourth pair our son will bring back with him.

All in all, we have no reason to buy eye glasses in the US again. Our insurance coverage is terrible. We have also noticed that the prices in those shops that take our insurance is proportionally higher to the amount covered as those places that don't take it. So its the same as not having any insurance at all.

And to end this post, as further proof of my aged-ness, there was an AARP application waiting for me in the mail upon our return to the US...

How To Un-AdultProof a Pill Bottle

As we have all discovered, child-proof bottles really aren't. They're more 'Adult-Proof' than anything else. That push-down while twisting action just doesn't happen easily as we all get older. However, its fairly easy to Un-Adultproof one of these caps, which is far safer than just dumping the pills into a regular bottle and forgetting what's inside.

This probably falls under the "It's News to Me" category, but I thought I blog about it anyway.

While in China my in-laws were having a particularly hard time with a stiffer than normal cap on a pill bottle of vitamins. So I took a look...

It turns out, these child-proof caps are actually two caps in one. The Inner cap has the threads to screw onto the bottle, and the outer cap has gear-like teeth to engage the inner cap when you press down.

[Please note that this photo in no way endorses, advertises, vilifies or eulogizes the Costco Brand of "Mature" Vitamins or the Centrum brand it bears a striking resemblance to. Bottle is used for illustrative purposes only. Copyrights and Patents of respective products are property of their respective companies. No liability or responsibility of any kind is expressed or implied herein. Use at your own risk. Some settling of contents may have occurred. This photo should not be viewed by anyone.]

How I did it - by Dr. Victor Von-Frankenstein
[a reenactment]

So all you need to do is cut away the outer cap.


First, cut a notch in the lip of the outer cap:


Then cut off the lip off the outer cap:


Discard outer cap and use the Inner cap on the bottle.


Ta-da! You have now freed yourself and your elders from the burdens of an overprotective, overly litigious society. Now, go have a beer and bask in your grand achievement!

Serious Mahjong

America has Poker, China has Mahjong and as we discovered on our latest trip, they have a Mahjong table that just blew my mind!

My mother-in-law play Mahjong everyday with the neighbors, and most of the time she wins. But even she doesn't have one of these tables.

We were visiting my wife's aunt and cousins when they unveiled this to us. I was so blown away that we almost went out and bought one for ourselves.

Basically, you dump you Mahjong tiles into the hole that opens up the the center. The table then mixes and stacks the tiles, face down (how does it know?), into four neat rows, two tiles high, and pops them up from underneath. If you have two sets of tiles, one is always inside the table ready for the next round, so you never have to wait.

It's just wild!

Things I Ate

This last trip to China was a gastronomic extravaganza for me. So much fun. So much different food. So I thought I'd review the non-western delights in which I partook:

Snake
Yum. Double Yum. I had this before when over there. But this time my father-in-law prepared it for me, and it was just as good as I remembered. Mildly fried and tasty. Not much meat, and lots of bones, but well worth it. Comparable, only slightly, to pork. There is a video at the end of this post from the market preparing the snake for us. Not for the faint of heart, PETA people or vegetarians.

Snake spleen
So, after you are done devouring the snake meat, there is the spleen. Considered a delicacy and great for your health, you're supposed to eat/drink it raw in a glass of hard liquor (Maotai is what I had). Drop it in the glass and drink it down in one gulp. Yup, that's what I did and I'm still here to blog about it.


Eel
They're small. They're slimy. But they have a nice taste and not much bone. Comparable to Frogs legs.

Pig Brains
Yeah, I had second thoughts about this when considering the risks of spongiform encephalopathy (mad pig/cow disease), but I also think we overreact to minor outbreaks here and the Chinese don't feed their pigs pig meat or their cows cow meat. So I had some in a Hot-Pot dinner. Its like chalky soft dry tofu. Not much taste and not much texture. And so far, I'm not walking in circles and falling down (a lot).

Catfish Head
I've seen in Atchison, Kansas, they hang these on the fences. In China, that would be a travesty as it's a delicacy. A lot of fat, tastes like fish, with a lot of fat. Did I mention that it's a lot of fat? Gelatinous fat. Very fatty.

Pig Nose
Dogs actually have it pretty good here. Its not bad. Texture is like chicken gizzards, taste is like pork skin. And yeah, you know it's a snout - nostrils and all.

Turtle
OK, it pretty common here. But with the head, shell, feet and tail and all? And will there be an argument over who gets the head? I think not...

Camel
When went to a nearby middle-eastern restaurant and they offered Camel. So I thought, what the heck, why not? Not much different than beef, just a bit more gamy.

Durian Candy
Durian fruit is about the only thing Andrew Zimmern from the TV show "Bizarre Foods" just could not eat. Its smells like rotting flesh. I know. It was brought into my home one time and just about made me vomit. The candy though, does not have this smell. And it tastes like very rich vanilla ice cream - really.

Pig Feet
OK, that's fairly common here as well. But I had never had it before. Fatty, but not as much as Catfish head....

Pork Skin (soup)
Again, fairly common here. I've had this fried as Pork Rinds - like a lot of you have had. But this is the first time I've had it in a soup. Just about what you'd expect. Nothing really notable.

Here's that snake cleaning video. Don't watch unless your with that other PETA group: People Eating Tasty Animals.

China Trip May-June 2010

My wife and I just returned from our latest trip to Shanghai. It had been slightly more than a year since our last visit - way too long.

In preparation, I had been walking 7 miles and climbing 20 flights of stairs daily to get in shape. It was work well spent as I did not wear out from all the long walks or find myself out of breath.

We had a glorious time. It stopped raining the day after we arrived and stayed bright, warm and sunny up until the day after we left. It was like we were being welcomed there. Shanghai is known for its smog problems, but it was much better this time. I think this was due not only to the constant rains of the season, but the changes the city had made to accommodate the 2010 Shanghai World Expo.

We spent roughly 2 1/2 weeks there, which was a little less than I would have preferred, but all-in-all a pleasant length of time given the 24+ hours total travel time (door-to-door) each way.

When went to the Expo, bought some prescription eyeglasses, took a train to YiWu (e-woo), did general shopping and visited relatives. No big traveling or sightseeing this time, just a calm nice vacation.

We took lots of pictures and videos. My wife's new camera does panoramic shots, so there's lots of those we will be posting (like the one above)

Here's a list of topics I plan to blog about from this trip:

• Things I Ate
• Serious Mahjong
• How to Un-Adultproof a Pill Bottle
• I am Now Officially OLD
  
• YiWu and the Train
• DVDs: The Real Cost
• A Day in the Life - In Shanghai
• Fast Food Wars
• Expo and Knives
• We Are Too Clean - and the Boy Who Cried Wolf
  
• The Price of Mass Production

Hope you enjoy my posts!